Amanda’s Personal Story

It was 1986. When people met me and those who were in my life, saw an attractive, powerful, tenacious and successful woman. I was doing all the ‘right’ things and accomplishing what I thought I ‘should’ do.

My life looked excellent from the outside. But on the inside, it was a different story. Inside, I was a scared, wounded little girl, shaking in my boots, worried that someone would find out what was really going on for me.

I had to be perfect … the perfect daughter, the perfect wife, and the perfect employee. I had to keep my mask on, so they wouldn’t know the truth. I felt like a fraud, fooling everyone around me, including myself. I felt like a broken-down woman, in a marriage that didn’t work, and with little or no Self-esteem or Self-respect.

I looked everywhere to feel better … for other’s approval, acceptance, and love, excessive shopping, or emotional eating. At the very least, I tried to find a way to feel something since I felt so numb and was on automatic pilot.

I would create crises or drama in my relationships, my finances, or my work to feel alive in some way, even if it was destructive. My ex-husband and I would create fights since we did not know how to communicate constructively, or to be open and vulnerable, to let love in on any level.

I was so disconnected from me, my feelings, my faith, my desires, my passion, my creativity, and others. I was 30 years old and I felt like I was 90, with no spark or energy left within me.

I would sit in the middle of a church service with streams of tears running down my face. They were not tears of joy, but tears of sadness, anguish, and despair.

I wanted what others around me had. To feel connected. To be inspired. To love me, to love life, and to love Divine Source once again. To feel the spirit and love of the angels (both etheric and earth angels like my Aunt). The pain and inner struggle were so great that I quit going to church.

I went through three years of intense psychotherapy (individual, marriage, and group each week!) and went back and forth with it over the years, but nothing really shifted. It helped me become aware of my problems and their source, but not to heal or resolve them.

I read the book, Co-Dependent No More, and thought I was the worse person ever and had no hope of how I could change that. Only when I discovered energetic healing did I and my life finally began to shift. It started my True healing journey … it helped me heal at the very core of my pain and issues, and the way I thought, felt, believed and lived life began to change. It revitalized my spirit within.

I was still in the corporate world at this time. But one day that unexpectedly changed … my Soul got me fired! It was the first day in my New York office on January 2, 1997. The publishing firm where I worked shut down our Tampa office and wanted me to move to New York.

Ten years earlier, I would have jumped at the chance to live there. But now I was 40 years old, had built a beautiful custom home in Tampa, Florida, and the last thing I wanted was to live in a shoebox in busy Manhattan.

At the time, I continued to live by my ‘shoulds’. I really had no clue what I wanted, what I was passionate about any more, or even ‘why’ I did the things I did.

I climbed the corporate ladder and achieved success while making six figures. I was a VP of Marketing & Sales, with a staff of 14, worked 70-80 hours a week, traveled around the country, but I had no personal life. I wasn’t happy. All I knew were my ‘shoulds’… I ‘should’ do this or that to succeed in my life.

So, when the ‘powers that be’ made the unilateral decision to close the Tampa office and I had to relocate to keep my job, I begrudgingly went to New York. That first day in New York, I woke up startled, after having a strange dream. I shook it off and went into the office at 7am.

I got my new office set-up and visited different departments to check on projects. Slowly but surely, I got more and more upset, as I found out my General Manager had undermined everything I implemented and didn’t consult me before making changes.

At 11am, we had our weekly phone call together. As we began the call, it was like something came over me. I felt a surge of energy flowing through me from the top of my head, all the way down my body. This energy took over what I was saying.

It wasn’t me talking … it was my Soul talking. I expressed my frustration about what he was doing. I questioned why he was relocating me to NY and not utilizing my expertise. I called him out on his actions … the same thing they had done with my predecessor … having all of the responsibility, but none of the authority. When I was first offered the position, we had an agreement that I would not be their puppet. I reminded him this is not what I had signed up to do.

It was like a cartoon. As the words tumbled out, I tried to gather them and literally stuff them back in my mouth. Interestingly, I had been ‘stuffing’ my feelings for eons, so this was nothing new.

It felt like there was another Amanda in the room. This energy and power that was surging through me was amazing. Knowing what I know now, it was my Soul taking over and saying, “Enough is enough. You’re done here and it’s time to move on.”

When I hung up the phone, I thought, “Well, as a marketer this was not the way to keep my job … I just nailed my coffin shut.” Two hours later, I was called in the CFO’s office and was fired.

As I walked out of his office, I immediately felt relief. I thought, “My Soul just got me fired … it has set me free!”

I immediately remembered the dream I had earlier in the morning. Its message was that everything would be okay … it may be rough for a while, AND I would emerge with the sun shining brightly upon me. I had no idea what that meant, but for some reason, I trusted it.

I had no plan B, and really didn’t know what I wanted for my Self. I was well-respected in the industry, so I had many potential opportunities. However, when I went to the interview, I sat in my car in their parking lot, crying and feeling totally drained. There was no spark, nor enthusiasm to continue on this career path. I knew something had to change, and a new job was not the answer.

I tumbled into a deep depression. Two months later, I literally fell to my knees in utter despair and asked God for help. And truth be told … I really didn’t ask. I told God that if things didn’t change in 6 months, I’m out of here (yes, suicide). I let God know I was willing to do anything that would help me to change … just show me the way.

Well, what I didn’t know is I had actually asked to be put on a ‘fast track’ of healing, transformation, and expansion. I’d been on a spiritual path for years, and recently started learning about energetic healing.

I attended workshops, not understanding what energy was, what a chakra was, but I knew in my heart that I was in the ‘right’ place. I had no idea what I was doing, but did know I always felt better after an energetic healing session.

My exploration was the catalyst for my Soul to take over and show me the way. I felt dead inside for years. When I started with energetic healing, I became alive again. I could feel the energy move within me. My feelings began surfacing, so I could recognize when something was ‘off’ for me.

I resisted at first, because I feared if I opened up the gate to my feelings, I would drown in a flood of emotions and dissolve into nothing. And, for a time, I did. By dissolving the ‘shoulds’, the walls around my heart began to drop. The ‘old’ thoughts and beliefs shifted about who I thought I was and what I ‘should’ do. I was able to tap into the REAL me.

In 2001, I was preparing to lead a group to swim with the dolphins in Bimini. Two days before leaving, I ‘downloaded’ a set of symbols. I had no idea what they were or what they did. I was ‘guided’ that I would use them for my Self first, and then to teach others.

When I was ‘guided’ back then, I usually went ‘kicking and screaming’ all the way. I usually acquiesced since I knew that what I did in the past didn’t work, so I was willing to try anything.

However, I wasn’t always a willing participant. Many times I argued with the Divine and my Soul as to what I was being asked to do. My personality/egoic Self (P/E Self) liked things just the way they were, even though I was unhappy and unfulfilled. My P/E Self liked the ‘familiar’, even if it was uncomfortable and no longer served me.

My P/E Self liked to be in control and wanted to know the ‘who’, ‘what’, ‘when’, ‘how’ and ‘why’, and this ‘guidance’ thing was an ‘unknown’. My P/E Self wanted to avoid the ‘unknown’. This usually meant not listening to my intuition or guidance, playing it safe, and not rocking the boat (especially with family and friends).

My Soul was done with that! It reached out to my P/E Self and asked me to co-create a new life and a new way of ‘BE’-ing together. Over time, I learned how to trust my intuition, my Soul and the guidance shared with me. I learned to trust my Self and the Creator within me.

Part of that journey was to discover my True Purpose, which was to develop The Diamond Co-Creative System™ (the System). My mission is to help steward individuals to connect on a Soul level and with their Greater Soul’s Purpose, Passion, and Plan, so they can thrive and prosper.

When the System came to me, I felt totally shutdown, lacked clarity, and was uncertain of who I was and what I even wanted. The System helped me connect with both me and with the Universe (the Divine). ‘Connection’ was where I needed to start, and is Truly where we all are called to begin.

During my journey, I became more connected to my Soul’s Essence, my Guides, and with what I am here to do. I came to understand how the System helps you become more aware of your reason for being here, and the gifts you have to offer. It contains the Codes to help you create Freedom within you and for your life.

I Truly believe in the System because it works!!! What was ‘running’ me before, no longer does. I healed my co-dependency, and so much more that was getting in my way of success … in relationships, in business, in finances, in health and well-being and generally in all aspects of my life. I live life fully in love, joy, peace, and prosperity.

I work the System and use it daily. One of my favorite tools from the System is the Universal Manifestation Template … it helped me manifest success and my MORE, such as:

My New Home …

 A New Lifestyle …

 Co-Create Your Success
SOUL Retreats …

I invite you to check out how you can Manifest Your ALL! and receive one of the tools for FREE that I personally used throughout my journey to create the life, relationships, health & well-being, prosperity and business I hoped for and envisioned … Click Here!